And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides You. Psalm 73:25b
If there was ever a year to learn this lesson it would have been last year. With shutdowns and limits on what we can do, what did I learn about my desire for God? Was it enough to be able to commune with only Him or did I think I needed more?
I thought I needed more. I have felt smothered with these circumstances. I really don’t know how to take it from a spiritual standpoint. On one hand, I see the opportunity to just be with God and learn to have a desire for only Him. However, I see so much of my connection to feeling fulfilled in my soul tied to what I can do to serve Him and others. When I can’t do this I get depressed and withdrawn from God.
Like Jesus, I have to be about my Father’s business. But maybe what I think is His business is not what He thinks. Maybe my Father’s business is to create a desire only for Him, not dependent on anything outside of Him. Sure, He still expects me to serve, but if I can’t be okay with just having Him, then where is my heart truly at?
I’m definitely a work in progress on this one. How about you?